Standing in line at Subway today, a fairly large man approaches and stands directly behind us.
Innocently, Hailey gives him a once over, looks at me and very loudly asks, “That a big guy, mommy?”
Ohhhh, I wasn’t prepared for that one. I shyly glanced over at the man and smiled sheepishly. Luckily, he either did not hear or was doing a good job of ignoring my daughter’s precise observation.
Not only did it happen once, but a second time with another large man after we sat down to have our lunch.
Any suggestions for “Isn’t she cute?” comebacks?
Ah, yes. The age of observation. When they realize that people aren’t all the same. My basic line that we repeat and reinforce is “Everyone’s different! Some are tall and some are short. Some people get to use wheelchairs and some people get to have machines to help their ears hear better.” This then goes into skin color, eye color, birth abnormalities, etc. I ALWAYS try to refer back to the fact that everyone has differences. Example, when Corinne pointed out a little boy’s leg braces and crutches recently, I replied with something like “Those are to help him walk. Everyone has something different, just like you have a special birth mark, and Mommy has brown hair, and Nana has glasses.” It usually diverts the attention from the stranger and onto people they personally know. I know that most parents have appreciated it when we have handled it this way.
ACK! LOL. They do have a way of making us cringe at times. I like Tracey’s answer.
tracey’s answer is great! i do the same thing, but usually i’m caught too offguard and too embarrassed at that precise moment to say that right away… usually i’m telling my daughter that sort of “everyone is different” line AFTER we’ve already left the scene.i’m currently working on not getting flustered at that moment, and incorporating the “everyone different” line right then and there… it’s harder than it sounds though!