My toddler is just O.O.C. these days.

I don’t generally eat at fast food places like McDonalds, Wendys or Burger King but today I just needed a quick lunch so I could get her down for a nap. Let me backtrack for a minute…the kid woke up on the wrong side of the crib this morning. She’s been a terror all morning. NOTHING is making her happy. My guess is that something is hurting her. Whether it’s her body or her teeth, it has to be something. I know she’s going through growing pains and we just can’t understand that as adults. Days like this, you almost HAVE to give them whatever they want to calm them down. Although, I am keeping the sugary stuff away from her.

So, we get to Wendys and she’s a MESS. She’s screaming and flailing. I forgot to put shoes on her feet. Yeah. I did. My thoughts kept moving toward what the restaurant patrons were thinking of us. Here I am, in my jeans, cheesy pink Urlacher jersey and tiny hair up in a half pony tail on my head and then there’s my kid, un-brushed hair, shoeless and screaming. I was the perfect resemblance of suburban white trash.

But I digress. So, I couldn’t put her down because I didn’t want the fast food cockroaches to get her. I’m doing my best to remain calm. I HAD to correct her. If I wouldn’t have, it just would have gotten worse. Although, it really didn’t get any better. I think the guy in line behind us must have given her a dirty look because for a few moments, she was as quiet as can be, just staring over my should at him with her hand shielding her face. Then, we sat down in a booth and I closed my eyes and downed a Jr. Bacon Cheeseburger. I don’t know why I just told you that. Anyway, she’s standing up on the seat, looking over the back of the booth and POINTING at people at the table next to us and yelling “Kids! Kids!”. She also informed me that she wanted to “eat the plant” near our booth. I’m actually laughing right now because kids will be kids and it is sort of funny. It wasn’t while it was happening though. I just kept looking at her, shaking my head and thinking how much cuter could she be? She thinks she owns the world and she just has no clue at all. It really is impossible to stay angry at them for long even though I was tempted to just run out of the restaurant and leave her there with the fast food cockroaches.

I’m convinced that kids go through that terrible two stage as a payback for how we acted with our parents as children. Our own children force us to understand what it was like for them. Either that or I gave birth to the devil’s child. I emailed my husband to ask him if he had any relation to Satan, maybe an ancestor or something?

Anyway…I’m really starting to appreciate working in the evenings. It’s a nice break from the fire and pitchforks.

*One of my original Chicago Moms Blog posts