We poured a margarita for me and opened a bottle of beer for him. Then we went out onto the balcony to enjoy the calm, 65 degree evening. We got to talking about music, about where the last ten years have gone and about life in general. It felt good. It felt right. It felt very, very needed.

The last couple of years for my husband and I have been a whirlwind. We’ve spent more time away from each other and less time communicating. When I found out I was pregnant early 2005, my husband decided it was high time that he got back to school to further his education. This took him away from home three to four nights per week. I went into pre-term labor, which was unexpected and last year just slipped right through our fingers. He finally graduated this past February and then I started a part-time job which takes me away from home two to three nights per week and some weekends. It seems like the time we DO spend with each other, we’re both sitting on the couch with our laptops on our laps and our eyes glued to the screen. He and I are both avid bloggers. We’re both fairly passionate about it too. It’s a great outlet for the both of us but it definitely takes away from our time “communicating” with each other.

I’m still trying to remember the time that we didn’t own a single computer. We barely had any furniture and we didn’t go out much. We would just sit and talk to each other. We’d actually spend quality time with each other, planning our future. It’s not that I don’t think we have a lot to talk to each other about now but I guess we just communicate in other ways. Maybe it’s that we’re just so comfortable with each other, we don’t feel like we always need to “speak” to communicate. However, that is the one thing that I took away from our wedding day, when the priest said that you must keep the lines of communication open. Does sitting across from each other on the couch count as communication? Does taking our toddler for a wagon ride count?

I don’t know but last night felt good. We talked, a lot. We made time for each other to express our insecurities and where we’re both at in life. It was sort of like a “Hey, are we still on the same page here? Yeah? Cool. Want another beer?”

I guess what it all comes down to is that I don’t think we necessarily need to “talk” to each other all of the time to communicate. I’m content with the fact that he’s right there beside me on the couch, doing something that he loves and then going to bed with me at night. Those little glances and smiles are enough for me to know that things are good. Things are real good.

*Original Chicago Moms Blog post